i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
nutella sex= disaster
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
