did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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