Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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