I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Randomize
