Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
