i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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