Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
