Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
