We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
