bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
