so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
