I should be sponsored by Trojan
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
