I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize