Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
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