I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize