Jerry, you need to find god
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize