Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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