Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize