That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I understand Curling. That high.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize