Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
