Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
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