Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Sober January is a disaster.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
