Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
