If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
