$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
