Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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