What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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