I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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