So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
