i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
