He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Randomize
