a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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