Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
