do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
