They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
