Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Randomize