Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
