Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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