How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Randomize
