My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
