I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
