So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
