i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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