do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
