During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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