Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
