I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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