Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
We're too hungover to prance.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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