i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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