ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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