We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
