i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
He has the fingertips of a God
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